Title: F.U.B.A.R.
Author: Joe King
Series: F.U.B.A.R. (Book 1)
Genre: Action/Comedy/Horror
Publisher: Self Published
Release Date: Dec 24 2014
Editions/Formats Available In: eBook and Print
Blurb/Synopsis:
An aimless, down on his luck man discovers
a clandestine government agency tasked with combating supernatural evil,
beneath the grounds of a mental health hospital where he works; the agency, the
Frontline Unified Battalion of Arcane Resistance (F.U.B.A.R.). Getting
recruited for their cause, he is accidentally afflicted with a curse, casting
the sensible ego aspect of his personality into a subconscious prison, allowing
his psychotic id to take over his body. Now this madman must lead a motley crew
of supernatural agents, including a punk rock witch, a werewolf, a medium and
the ghost of his best friend, and a female Japanese ninja, against a globe
spanning, world devouring evil, whilst dealing with the monsters inside his
head.
Amazon Kindle
Amazon Print
~ * ~
Excerpt:
Taking slow, measured
steps down the hallway to the source of the sound he was careful not to screech
the soles of his shoes on the linoleum. Dave found himself standing outside of
a small counselling office. The eye level plaque read Dr James Carver. Not
funny really, oh well. The voice was vaguely familiar to him as it teased his
memory. Sounding almost cartoonish, it took him a few seconds to place it.
Scooby-Doo! That was it, the voice sounded just like Scooby-Doo. Believing the
impression to be the doctor or his guest joking around, Dave carefully tiptoed
on the balls of his feet over to the door, tilting his ear to the wood. He
could do with a laugh.
The smile on his face
was genuine this time as it really was a good impersonation. But after a few
minutes of eaves dropping on the comedic accent, he came to the conclusion that
this was no joke. The speaker genuinely seemed to sound like that or it was
some diehard commitment to the bit. His smile slowly diminished at first, as
pangs of shame coursed through him at the knowledge that he was unknowingly mocking
this poor person. Finding subtle, private amusement in the antics of recovering
crack heads and schizophrenics is one thing, but the visualisation of himself
hanging around outside a room to unknowingly mock somebody who must suffer
similar treatment on a daily basis like they are a circus sideshow was cruel.
His look of regret instantly dissolved into a curious mix of jolting shock and
profound awkwardness as the door quickly swung open.
Standing before him,
he was greeted by a bemused looking Dr Carver. The doc was about forty, of
slight build and wore spectacles that looked like they were held together by
willpower and positive thinking. His semblance reminded Dave of the actor Sam
Rockwell. The doctor was observing Dave over the tops of his glasses, his brow
furrowed and his chin pointing down to his chest as if he was unsure of what he
was seeing. The silence stretched for a long moment and Dave was frozen like a
deer in headlights, waiting to get an absolute ear full for snooping on
personal matters concerning doctor-patient confidentiality. Uncertain on how to
explain his action, Dave’s brain sputtered along as it attempted to cobble
together whatever piss poor explanation he could for his actions. That’s when
his eyes drifted to the trail of thick dark matted hair that led across the
carpeted floor. Any attempt at an apology went on the backburner as his curious
eyes wandered across the hair strewn carpet towards the bulky figure casually
occupying the visitors’ chair. Dave’s blood turned to icy slush. It wasn’t a
plucky Great Dane. Sitting there in torn jeans and a ripped up red and white
plaid shirt was a werewolf.
~ * ~
Playlist for F.U.B.A.R.
Playlist for F.U.B.A.R.
These are the songs which appear at
various scenes of the novel. Unfortunately my laptop has a memory capacity
which is flat out laughable and therefore I can’t even download iTunes!!
Regardless, I believe the following listing is available on there.
Alice Cooper
‘No More Mr Nice Guy’
‘No More Mr Nice Guy’
Rob Zombie
‘Feel So Numb’
RUN DMC
‘Rock Box’
Tech N9ne
‘Overwhelming’
Black Sabbath
‘Sabbath Bloody Sabbath’
Social Distortion
‘Don’t Drag Me Down’
Robert Tepper
‘No Easy Way Out’
Jimi Hendrix
‘All Along The Watchtower’
Curtis Mayfield
‘Pusherman’
Thin Lizzy
‘Whiskey In The Jar’
Mickey Avalon
‘Stroke Me’
TOTO
‘Hold The Line’
Peter Gabriel
‘In Your Eyes’
UK Subs
‘Warhead’
Skid Row
‘18 And Life’
~ * ~
Author Information:
Joe King woke up one day, unsure of where
he came from or where he was going. To this day he blindly stumbles through
life hoping everything will turn out okay. At some point, he worked as a
janitor in a mental health hospital, where he discovered an obscene amount,
emphasise obscene, of hair on the carpet of one of the counselling rooms.
Naturally, he became convinced that the patient must have been a werewolf,
there is simply no other explanation. Not having any silver or dog collars to
hand he decided to knock the idea around which snowballed into F.U.B.A.R., his
first novel and the first instalment of the series.
When he's not writing, he enjoys reading
books and comic books, begrudgingly trying to emulate the fine work of the
talented comic book artists, loathing himself, slapping the bass in a rock
band, loathing himself a bit more and playing guitar.
Author Links:
Amazon Author Page
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